NLP – What is it? What does it mean?
With help of NLP techniques or neuro-linguistic programming, we will be exploring the relationships between the three most influential components creating human experience. How we think – NEURO, how we talk to each other or communicate(Linguistic) , our patterns of behavior, feeling , emotion (Programming) – the interaction between these creates a positive or negative life. In order to make positive choices understanding the relationship and choosing to change effectively the way we think and act. Adopting these changes can bring about the positive changes. The powerful change management tool that allows to communicate and manage ourselves and others more effectively is NLP.
You can make your mental picture work for you and not against you with help of NLP techniques –
1. Letting go of the Past:
There are many past events that we hold onto , then there are certain experiences we are afraid of facing or don’t want to go through that experience, but due to our constant thinking we keep playing and replaying these unpleasant events in our mind which actually we need to leave behind in the past.
Make the picture in your mind still and static, visualise putting a frame or border around it, push your mental picture of that event or happening further away from you into the distance, start taking the colour out of it, changing the colour to black and white.
Shrink the mental picture down, push it further into the distance. Disassociate yourself from the picture. Push it far away, far off into the distance. At the same time make the picture smaller and smaller. Finally white it out. Let the picture totally disappear.
2. Creating Your Own Reality through Visualisation
We have many dreams and goals that we are running behind for we want our reality to be different than what it is. We all are heroes in our own story and want to see yourself victorious in our own way. The good news is human ability is unlimited and universe has abundance of everything. It’s like you ask for something and it’s often given to you.
Make your mental picture of you achieving that goal: big, bold, a moving image (like a movie) and in full colour. Make the mental movie even bigger, more vibrant and bring it even closer to you- and finally when the picture is perfect ‘step’ or float in. Associate your mental picture with all your five senses wide open. See what you see going around you as if through your own eyes, hear what you hear going on around you as if through your own ears. Allow yourself to taste, touch, smell, experience what you see, hear and most importantly feel. Connecting and associating with your desired outcome in this way will fire your hunger to achieve that outcome and motivate you to take action.
3. Start Before You Start & Finish Before You Finish
Start before you start:
At the beginning of a training course, coaching session or a sales call, after we’ve made our introductions, I say something along the lines of “There’s some stuff I’d like to cover before we begin…” Then I begin!
People have their armor off before the formal ‘beginning’ of a session, and it’s a great time to work with them. Personally, I never actually get to the point where we formally begin. I do all the work in either the ‘pre-beginning’ section, or after the end
of the session. Which reminds me…
Finish before you finish:
If you’re having difficulty getting to the point you want to, you can say “Well, I think that’s enough for today” and get up to leave. Then say “Oh, just one more thing…” and start again. You will be amazed at what can pop out when you finish before you finish.
4. Belief Change
From childhood onward we gather around ourselves a complex web of beliefs, assumptions and opinions that guide and affect our everyday lives. Many of these are so deeply ingrained, that we spend most of our conscious time being completely unaware of them. Some of these beliefs are inherited from the society in which we were formed and others are of our own idiosyncratic creation. We are often unaware of some of these core beliefs until we find them challenged, when we often fly into an otherwise inexplicable defensive rage.
When taken together, an individual’s beliefs constitute a person’s unique worldview, a web of assumptions whereby we filter and interpret the events going on around us. All beliefs limit our behavior in some way and many have a positive effect. However, some beliefs reinforce negative behavior patterns that have a deleterious effect on the way we think and interact with other people.
5. Self Compassion
Find a place where you are comfortable and won’t be disturbed. Think of 5 characters that you regard unconditionally. These could be family members, friends, pets, childhood toys. As long as they are someone whose opinion you respect. Call up an anxiety and step into that worry. Immerse yourself in it. Describe it using all your senses and then come up with a totally honest description of how you feel: “I really feel worried about . . . it makes me feel shaky and sick.”
Relax gently and imagine all the thousands and thousands of people in the world who also feel this way. Gently wish them well, send them gentle good wishes, and imagine them wishing you well in return. Surround yourself with your characters. Imagine them saying to you “Be kind to yourself, care for yourself, nurture yourself, be kind, nurture, care for . . .” Repeat these words to yourself, and accept those nurturing and compassionate thoughts.
When you have finished, check in with how you feel. Has anything changed? Accept however you are, don’t question it. Notice something, however small, that you can do to help yourself in the future. Come back into your day and take that learning with you. As humans, we can be very self-critical. This self-compassion technique restores some of the balance and is good for our mental health.